Bad Words
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There are certain words in the English language that should not be. They annoy me to the point that I feel compelled to write a tersely-worded manifesto about them and send it to a website that has a long history of publishing the rants of maladjusted geeks who think too much.
"Nonsensical" ranks pretty high on my list. It sounds like it belongs in the lyrics for a song from a 1940s musical that flopped in its first week. It has many superior synonyms, like "ridiculous". I really like saying "ridiculous." Fun to say. "Nonsensical", however, reminds me of a cross between the name of an obscure venereal disease I researched once for a biology class and a brand of home enema. Also, if you use "nonsensical" too much, you may also use its verbal gay lover, "common sensical". Then you will both annoy me and sound like a slapass.
"Verbatim" is not quite as obnoxious as the previous examples of rhetorical diarrhea, but it is a very whiny word. Whiny people say "verbatim". People with herpes say it too (I would suspect). I am not sure if the reverse of that statement is true, and if you use "verbatim" you will get herpes, but I wouldn't like to find out. Herpes-free is the way to be!
"Effervescent" is a word that should only be used in the context of Alka-Seltzer. It is not a personality type exemplified by Regis Philbin's former cohost, neither is it a redeeming quality of the movie "Dude, Where's My Car?". It means fizzy and bubbly. To the extent of my knowledge, that was not a fizzy and bubbly movie. Kathie Lee Gifford is not a carbonated person. She's just annoying, and so is "effervescent".
I would have to say the word that causes me to audibly cringe is "pleasurable" (ack). I know some people who use it as a substitute for "fun", a nice, wholesome, inoffensive adjective. Example: "Gee, I never knew something like that could be pleasurable." (Ack ack ack. Ack.) If you wish to piss me off, describe my actions as "pleasurable". That is, if you don't mind sounding like a prick at the same time. "Pleasurable" = "I am a prick," or "I am far to fond of my mother." (Ack.)
In reflection, I think there are way too many words around. Let's make it easier on ourselves and simply get rid of the ones we don't like. (Especially the decasyllabic ones. And "decasyllabic".) That way we can make room for all the fun new words internet geeks like to invent.
Long live the cyber-semantic revolution! Death to the verbally obnoxious! Are you with me?
Yeah, that's what I figured.
F. Amelia Howes has one of those sexy abbreviations that are so popular around here lately